New Nature

How marvellous is nature!

Yesterday was a moving day.
We went to see the echo,
I mean to take an echo, to see the baby.

I used to be quite scared of embryos and foetus and stuff.
But God Taught me the way.
During my first weeks, He Brought me consistently into contact with
new born animals and pictures and stuff.
Now, I find it the funniest thing there is!
It is all a bunch of cells becoming this or that.
But the exquisiteness of God is that He Knows and Leads directly if it is going to be this or that.
And that is why a species is maybe the same, but why no animal, no human being is exactly the same.

It is funny to see a mini-me, or a mini-he in a big screen, while lying down.
I never saw such a small and active heart.
The baby was already moving and had a facial expression of its own.
I don't know if I imagine it, but it looked quite satisfied, happy, laid back and relaxed,
while also being movable, discovering arms and legs and stuff.
It is still small, but bigger than expected.

It ain't twins, and somehow, I am quite relieved.
Twins would be fine as well, but with the Authenticity of God, it would be a bit....?
weird maybe to have the Authenticity duplicated.
Also it would not be really practical, as a child must be also practically fit into daily routines
and God Makes me to make a Stand in the Doing.
Moreover I find it remarkable, that God Makes me make a Stand in the Doing,
while also providing me a baby.
But that Is God, you never get it the easy way, but in the end, it will all fit together and
even multiply in its outcome.
I somehow feel that this child is already bringing me blessings and helping me to take
a stand in general.

With my own abnormal start, of non-acceptance, doing everything by myself, weird stuff
happening all around me, it is somehow such a relieve to have this 'normal' pregnancy,
and actually seeing something moving your belly! Until yesterday, we still had the fear of
making the whole pregnancy up, but how funny it then is to see a little Being having installed
him/herself in the Hotelroom of your Belly!

Having that said, we went to the Municipality to acknowledge the child.
We agreed on giving it both surnames in a row. To stay balanced.
But then we heard that the Dutch Law doesn't agree and that we must pick one.
First of all, we sat in a wooden cabin, of which I recall myself having the documents signed
for my former marriage. Then it was only one year ago, (not even) for having the divorce stuff
settled here. Then it was half a year ago, for having the marriage of my sister, and now we had to
decide within a few minutes, which surname the unborn child should have.

When Marvin and I see each other after a week, we always need some time to get on one line,
during the weekend it goes smoothly, but in the beginning it is always two lines. And this was
exactly such a moment of meeting after a week.
So, stupid arguments passed the scenery, for
doing this or that.
I said: 'Let's throw some coins'.
He said: 'It doesn't matter, I thought it was both names'.
I said: 'What do you want?'
He said: 'What do you want?'
We both said: 'I don't know'.
Some minutes past away.
The emancipation-stuff went through my mind.
Marvin's deceased father went through my mind.
The rens went through my mind.
The pizzeria went through my mind.
Still, I didn't know. He didn't know.

I recalled that earlier that day, but also many times before, we had discussed the fact of doing risk-research for birth and genetic complications. I was against it. He wanted it.
I was against it, because, I don't want technology to spoil the enjoyment of life and I don't want the pregnancy to be sorrowful, while you have no guarantee, and I just don't want to know, as it is how it IS. The echo-center, had us make this discussion again.
Then we agreed on Fiorenza, as an hommage to the diseased father (he did make place in the family system), and I negotiated that I didn't go for the risk-test. (The lawyer in me). Also I like the name, as it is 'renzing' around the world and you never know if the child is going to take over my pizzeria ;),
and if we break up, then at least we know who the father is ;)).
Okay... this is always how it goes, when we first meet after one week. During the weekends the true love develops...

Talking about the pizzeria, I have to go!

Godaya